momiji-aya

oh well, time surely flies..... i have new role at work since July 2023. life wasn't easy on me in 2023. lots of emotional drains on work, dirty politics, betrayal and survival mode is at the most actively used hahaha I have to wait 8 months to claim my reward after all the dramas at work, but yet things aren't get settled completely. having layers of incompetence bosses is totally pain in the *ss peoples at my department might think that i need this position badly, my boss might think i am naive and they can keep on using me to do things they couldn't fix because they don't want their hand to get dirty. many times i would have slap them all with a fish but then i realized, oh well, let them be.. it' like dealing with zombies, they only wanna eat my brain, while i am working my *ss off for my fur babies sake at least they have to live their best while I'm around :heart: 2024, please be kinder...

Two of my favorite celebration in life are Christmas and Lunar New Year. But recently these 2 occasions gave me a terribly sad felling. In Christmas 2014 i lost my Mom, Lunar New Year 2023 i lost my father... out of the blue i am an orphan without elder i can count on anymore... suddenly i am the eldest in the family where we are strangers one to another.. i wonder is this the time we start parting for real or should i work hard to get everybody's back.. my life recently filled with love of my doggos... work are no longer fun, beside the monthly payment.. its like a ticking bomb to chose keeping the job and lost my doggos, or dump the job and bring my doggos home... i feel so lost i'm not happy not sad just simply empty

I feel like i wanna write after sometime... I get to learn a lot from this company i am currently working for, i get to see so less peoples have dignity and integrity. Most peoples get to their position not because they are capable, but because they have a/some 'backup(s)'. It doesn't matter if they are capable or not, they can sit still in nice position and untouchable. they are lucky, but become a disaster for the company itself. I do'nt know if the chairman aware of this. Obviously, Its sad, for someone like me who climb up with all effort i have these 11th year trying to earn living independently in this province. moving from capital city to this province was not easy, i was so angry and lost back then, i never get to choose and walk on the path i want. back then i keep blaming the external factors. But, slowly i get to learn that i wont go anywhere if i never try, and failing is not the end of everything. After moving, life was never easy, i get to head to head with my parent